learning simple things

My cousin Terra.  Well she started out as my cousin Buttzie.  We are only a couple years apart.  Growing up in a large family, small town we were only bound to end up more like sisters than best friends.  We were together all the time.  Fighting continually throughout our years.  You know, me stealing her clothes, boyfriends (well not so much, just her friends that where boys).  Her wanting to be like her big cool cousin.  We have been through a lot together.  Good and bad.  Her making me wear that ugly brides maid dress - bad.  Very Bad!
Anywhoo, I need to shorten this up.  Life goes on.  She has a beautiful son.  One she would lay down and die for as any other mother would.  He develops this rare disease (I don't even know the name of) and has had many surgeries throughout his young life. He is a whole other blog.  Amazing child.  Deals with a pain you or I couldn't imagine having everyday.  As she is wishing she could take this all away from him, she discovers she has a brain tumor.

Ok, this is where my heart expands.  This woman is going through so much, yet I was able to have dinner with her and enjoy a movie afterwards.  Easy you would think.  Yes, it was for me.  For her, not so much.  Of course, because of the med's she is not able to enjoy a glass of wine.  While she is ordering she is wondering how she can read the menu because her vision is so bad.  We enjoy dinner and head off to the movie.  The movie, where she can't sit for to long, because of the swelling in her body from the massive amounts of steroids that she is on.  Soon into the movie a hot flash comes over her.  I feel her head and she is on fire.
Here's the thing.  Through all of this.  She didn't bitch once.  Not once.  She amazes me.  I would be crying for the world to hold me.  To realize what I was going through.  Not her.  I wouldn't leave my house.  Drive - noway.  Not her.  Remember to take my 30 pills a day.  She does that.  Sit through a movie in misery trying to act like nothing is bothering her.  Not me.
I'm feeling bad because I didn't work out all week.  Because my business' stress me out.  Because the weather sucks.  Really?  Really?  Time for me to simplify my life a bit.  Time for me to be humble.
Time for me to give back what Terra gives me.  STRENGTH.  You have professional football players trying to win a game (getting paid millions), Tiger Woods trying to save his career and name brand.  Politicians trying to win your vote.  Terra is just trying to fight her battle as well as her Sons.  Not for money or fame.  None of that matters.
Thank you Terra for loving me until you hate me.  I will always love my Buttzie.

Blogging

Yes, I'm kind of new to this whole blogging idea.  Is it really worth it for me to sit down and tell you how I feel or what I think of certain things?  Do people still read blogs?  I guess I do.  I like to check out random blogs about hair and fashion.  Do's and Don'ts.  That kind of thing.
I just don't feel like I can be totally honest here, because I might just offend someone.  I might just say what I truly think and then what?  You send me hateful emails.  You face book me horrible things.  Is it really worth it to give the world to much information?  To much knowledge about ones self?  I'm an open book.  You get what you see.  I say it like I see it.  Gets me in trouble all of the time.  I guess I can't quit now.  What fun would that be?

Monday, Monday, Monday

I'm sitting here thinking that it is fall and I'm what you consider middle aged.  I think I am at least.  41?  Is that middle age?  If it is, I have a whole hell of a lot of stuff I need to get done before I'm old age.  I am looking forward to becoming old, I don't want it to fast.  We know what happens after old age.
Have I ran enough races?  Cooked enough cookies?  Left my mark on this world so that someday my great, great grandchild will remember me and say: "you know that was my great G.G that did....."  What did I do?  What is it?  I'm looking for it.  Is that what people do when they are middle aged?  Looking for it?  Instead of realizing they have it?  I know I have it.  Love, Life, Laughter and a whole bunch of other stuff in between.  Happy Monday.

A day in debbie's Head.: Work out harder????

A day in debbie's Head.: Work out harder????: I mean really? Really? I ran this morning, worked all day and then went to my class for what I guess you could call kick boxing. Grante...

Work out harder????

I mean really?  Really?  I ran this morning, worked all day and then went to my class for what I guess you could call kick boxing.  Granted, I probably shouldn't have eaten a bag of m&ms on the way over.  I did have a red bull.  I thought it gave me wings.  I worked out so hard that my knees are black and blue, I can't cough with out feeling the aches in my abs and I am deleting and retyping just as fast as I can because of the shakes.  Although that could be from not having a drink since Saturday as well.
Leaving the class with my sweaty headband (I forgot to slip the depends pad in it, you would be amazed at how much sweat this holds.  Patent pending) and wings on my back.  Feeling like I could take on the world.   I get the "hey Debbie".  "Your only here for an hour.  You should really try to give it your all."  I thought he was only kidding.  I mean talk about taking the air out of my wings.  I thought I did give it my all.

Poop lip sticking out, head down I leave the room.  Wanting to cry all the way home.  I could quit.  That would be easy.  I don't do - EASY.  I'll be back.  With wings and my depends for my headband.

Mondays aren't bad in my world.

I went for what I thought would be a nice little run today.  Instead, I ended up going for a great walk with my camera.  I met a little friend on the trail (We'll call him Fred) Not sure if he was going to make it.  He wasn't moving much.  What else was I to do but put him in my sports bra and continue on my walk.
My friend Fred and I went a little farther down the trail and I came across these strange mushrooms.  Do you eat these?  I wonder if I would die if I just licked them?
As Fred and I continued down our path, we entered the tunnel of sticks.  Some people hate these (wikee ups, I like to call them) Fred and I love them.  They just add a little more something- something to the trails. If you like this, you should see the rock piles.
It was a great day.  For me at least.  I came home and googled frog legs for dinner.  Just kidding!

meeting my new niece

How thrilled I was to arrive safe and sound 8.5 hours after leaving home to arrive at my brothers house.  He had told me that if I needed him, I could call at anytime.  As he would have his phone by his bed.  I had texted him at 1:00 a.m. to send me his address.  He got it this morning.  A little late you could say.
Anywhoo, sleep finally arrived about 3:00 a.m.  Only to have my sweet little niece jumping on top of me at 6:00 a.m.  What a peanut.  I was able to spend some quality time with her before she left for school.  I had promised to read a story to her class as well as attend lunch with her later on today.  Good times.  I made a lot more friends and found out that I should probably think about going back to the first grade to learn some interesting things.  Who knew.  To, two and too.  Pronouns in first grade.  REally?  I thought we still would take naps.  I think they wanted to put me in time out after making 60 paper airplanes for the kids.  Oops.
My new little niece Kate.  God how I love her.  I didn't think it was possible.  She is such a good little baby.  Poor thing looks like a little old man with her hair line (no worries, Auntie crazy will fix that).  She is beautiful.  I can't wait to see what kind of woman she grows into.  She has the cutest smile ever.  I'm sure she is brilliant.
I need to catch some sleep so, I can continue to teach my elder niece how to fight.  There was a child in class that was bothering other kids.  I told her if he came around to kick the kid in the balls.  My brother told me that we don't talk like that in this house.  Oops.  So, I didn't talk.  I just showed her.  Tomorrow, back flips off the diving bored.  Boxing in the back yard and ice cream and cupcakes in the evening.  We played until she passed out tonight.  Hopefully we will do the same tomorrow.  I only have a day left.
Peace and love my friends.  Peace and love.

Family, love and losses

Family.  It's a funny thing.  When you come from a family that is as large as mine, you are bound to be fighting with someone.  That's alright.  When your family you can say what you want, speak your opinion (like it matters).  However, if your not my blood and you say something negative about my family.  Watch out.  Attack mode sets in.
It was a stressful day for some of my family.  It has been over three years ago that we have lost a loved one to murder.  How do you go on from that?  How do you not have anger deep down about this loss?  Revenge? How do you try to understand what happened? I'm not sure.  It is like a limb is lost.  You can move on and learn a different way of life, but you will always have this phantom feeling of that limb. You will always think he should be here.  He should see this.  Share this.  I still grieve for him.  I still miss him.  I can deal with my pain.  I have a hard time dealing with my loved ones pain.  It is however, amazing that as a family we can come together.  We can love each other so deeply.  We all share this loss.  Yet, there we are, a group of people with all this love and still hurting.  It's very emotional.  I am so lucky to have the family I do.  To have been raised with strong family support and values.  Family love.   I would never take it for granted.  I am very blessed.  Thank you God.

UPS driver watch out

You know when you can tell that it is just going to be an ugly day?  You know when you wake up and can't find anything to wear in your closet, that is flooded with clothes.  You know when your taking a shower and the drain is so plugged that the dirty water is rising up to your knees by the time your ready to get out.  You know the one.  The one that on your way to work, your stuck behind a driver in the passing lane that is going 10 miles under the speed limit... and then it goes something like this:
Busy work day (cutting hair) one after the other.  The Salon Coordinator comes back and says that I need a money order.  I ask her to run to the bank to get it (because that is all the company will accept), only to have my assistant come back and tell me that the UPS driver wouldn't wait or come back.  Trying not to look as pissed off as I am, because I have a client in my chair and I should be worrying about her hair, not killing the UPS driver.  Ugh.  I finally (maybe 5 min. later) run out the door with check book in hand to find the woman in the ugly brown uniform.  I spot her at a few business' down the street.  "Hey lady" I yell.  She tries to avoid eye contact.  "Hey you, lady" I yell again as I'm gaining on her.  I want my order, and I want it now.  She say's with attitude "I only have to stop once and you weren't able to get it". Are you flipping kidding me.  I said "I"m going to the bank, right there" and I point to it. "You better have my stuff back at the boutique."   She say's "I don't have to." Now mind you, between all of this, I have to go to the bathroom real bad.  I asked her if she is the sub for this route.  Thank GOD she was.  My regular driver knows the routine.  This story could get real long.  I get to the bank, only to have the teller tell me she couldn't give me a money order.  Well, I was pissed, but not as mad as I was when I opened my check book to find no checks.  Wow.  I yelled.  Now I had to run back to the Salon/boutique to get more checks.  I will be back in a hot second.  Talk to your supervisor.  They do this all the time for me. I finally get my money order.  I poke my head out the door to look both ways for the ugly brown truck with the ugly brown uniformed witchy woman.  There it is (and I'm talking about the woman).  Another block away from the Salon.  I run down to the truck.  Waiting  (legs crossed, doing the pee-pee dance) for her to come out of the building.  I shove the money order in her face and tell her that she better have that box of clothes at my door step by the end of the day.  It was a stand off.  She didn't want to give in and I didn't want to pee my pants.   Let's just say I got my clothes and I got to go to the bathroom.
The day continues:  I have two appointments not show up for their cuts and color (very frustrating).  Although I was able to steam my clothes. I'm so glad it's friday and I can order my fish fry. A smile finally comes across my face. They tell me it will be 45 min.  No problem.  I go to the bookstore to check out the running and muscle magazines to kill some time.  I want to buy a bag of chips so bad.  I however know that I have a bad heart and favor the idea of just eating my greasy fish fry it will only be a few more minutes.  While waiting, I drop my magazine.  Yup, I bent over to pick it up off of the floor and I heard and felt the rip and flash of my ass crack coming through my new 300 dollar jeans (no worries, I got them on sale big time).  Now what was I to do?  How was I to get to my car to pick up my fish fry?  I did it.   ONLY to get there and have that woman tell me "I hope you enjoy your fish, it's only been done for 40 min."  You know what?  Give me my damn fish.  I get home to enjoy the cold fish and my yellow undercooked baked potato.
I should have just ordered the damn fries.

fuzzy day

 A day in my head today is a little fuzzy from a day in my head last night at Sol Blu.  Ugh.

cheesy salesman

I'm telling you what, my biggest pet peeve (besides someone smacking - ugh) is when I'm working with a client and I get interrupted by some cheesy sales person off of the street.  Sure walk right in.  No worries.  My client doesn't care that your taking up her time.  She only has half of her color applied to her head.  Why don't we sit down and talk about what your selling.  We can deal with her hair later.
Don't come into my business with your song and dance to tell me about how I'm missing out on the next best thing.  Then tell me it's free.  Nothing is free.  That's when he smiles at me and says well cash free.  What?  Are you kidding me?  Buddy, if you want to sell me something and really think that I'm going to be interested in it, then first you need to make an appointment.  Second, you need to feed me something.  Anything really.  Just to show me you appreciate me taking time out of my busy day.  Third, be honest.  I'm not stupid.  Lay it out there.  Be real.  Otherwise you get the ugly Debbie.  God knows, I will be honest with you.  I don't have that sensitive gene.  Skipped right over me.
If that doesn't work.  Make sure I'm scheduled to be off and talk to Jon.  He buys into just about anything.  Good luck.

A day in debbie's Head.: Happy Anniversary

A day in debbie's Head.: Happy Anniversary: Today is the day I think? 15 years ago today. It was a wednesday. Jon worked until 2:00. While I tried to find the appropriate wedding d...

Happy Anniversary

Today is the day I think?  15 years ago today.  It was a wednesday.  Jon worked until 2:00.  While I tried to find the appropriate wedding dress to get married in.  That dress turned out to be one hot mess.  I mean really?  Navy blue dress with a huge bow in the middle.  Cropped Jacket to match. I wasn't going to a business meeting for the love of God.   I was getting married.  Wow!
The ceremony was a quick one at the court house. A simple one. I think they were in a hurry, because both dates are wrong.  From the receipt to the marriage license.  The license says I'm 10 years older than what I am.  Eh.  We had dinner at the beautiful Four Seasons Resorts.  Jon cut some flowers out of their front garden. He wanted to make sure when we posed for our wedding photo in front of the Limo (that was there for someone else) I would have a gorgeous bouquet.  Entertainment immediately followed at the casino.  Our best man, Maid of honor and ourselves.  WINNING
No big deal.  No big wedding.  No big reception.  We didn't spend thousands of dollars on flowers, photos or invitations.  We didn't have the desire for that.  It was about us and that was it.
I love knowing that I always have someone on my side.  That when it comes right down to it.  It's Jonnie and I.  It's still that simple.  Happy Anniversary to my best friend.  Now....  lets go get some sushi.

friendship/death

As I was running today, I was reflecting on the life of a new friend.  Unfortunately I did not really get to know him for very long.  He lost his life last friday night and I will be attending his funeral this evening with a group of girls from work.  As, I was thinking of him, I came to realize how short or long life can be.  I wonder if you live till your 100, do you think wow - that went by quick?  They have a page on fb that you can leave funny stories of Adam.  Because he was that funny kind of guy.  Trying to hit on a girl at a restaurant as she is walking into the bathroom.  She say's (with a frightened look on her face), "I'm only 16".  He of course say's "Make sure you friend request me on face book".  I'm reading some of these stories and come to realize most of them have to do with him doing crazy things and not wearing much clothing.  Which of course (for whatever reason) makes me wonder what I'm going to wear to the funeral tonight. Something simple?  Something black?  Or just my undies?

We only have so many real friends in our lives.  We have a lot of acquaintances.  You know - Hi, how you doing?  How are you parents?  I really don't have much else to say, so I will stand here for the proper amount of time and then move on.  But, true friends.   I mean really good friends, not family friends that you have to love.  Well maybe you don't, but I do.  Family is family (that's a whole other blog), I'm talking about no blood.  The person  you could count on for anything.  They are rare and should be cherished.

I think I may have learned something important today.  If you have a friend that you have lost as I have (I'm moving on to another friend.  Sorry, try to keep up).  Not thru death, but differences it may not be to late to make a mend.  To have no regrets.  I wonder.... if I broke my leg out on the trail and had my phone, would they still come and get me?  Would they still do anything for you despite your differences?  Is that a true friend?

Peace and love, Debbie

My first blog

Who would have thought it would take me this long to blog?  I mean, I'm writing a book.  I could just share my opinions on here.  Why work so hard on chapters, grammar, editing.  I could have just as much fun on here.  Well, we will see won't we.  Ready, set, GO!